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I went to McDonald's.
It's not what you think.
Every day on the bus, I pass a McDonald's. Sometimes I end up waiting at the bus stop in front of the McDonalds. The smell makes me queasy. I really dislike McDonalds. I think it is disgusting, and have thought so for a long long long time. I turned on McDonalds after going veg at 14, and I think I've probably eaten at McDonald's less than 5 times since then. My last meal there was an egg McMuffin my junior year of college, a very reluctant event that occurred out of absolute necessity in the desolate dietary wasteland of Moorehead, MN on a college trip with a music group. I am not an advocate of McDonald's.
Anyway, earlier this week, I noticed that McDonald's had changed the sign under the golden arches to read "Shamrock Shakes $2.99". Despite my disgust for the general establishment, I could taste the minty goodness in my mouth. I used to be quite the sucker for seasonal ice creams - pumpkin shakes in the fall, shamrock shakes for St. Patrick's day. I have always loved mint ice cream, and Shamrock Shakes, as a child, were a nice treat. Never mind the inevitable stomachache - I loved those things. In that very moment, I desperately wanted a Shamrock Shake. The golden arches were tempting me. I started obsessing over how I could make a dairy-free, sugar-free replica. It took over my brain. I had an idea, something that involved avocado, mint leaves, and ice. Yes. This would work.
When the bus stopped across from McDonald's yesterday, and I saw the sign again, I was overcome. I got up, I got off the bus, I crossed the street, and I walked in to the McDonalds. Yes, you heard me - I went in. My nostrils were filled the heavy smell of french fries. I went to the counter. I ordered.